A Bad Day!

This day last year (14/12/11) i was in a very bad place. It's probably one of the worst days of my life. Everything was going great with my recovery until i developed a high fever in the early hours of the morning so the nurses did the usual protocol of giving me paracetamol. Despite having been given 2 iv doses of paracetamol my fever kept going up and peaked at 42 degrees. I however was feeling so cold so u could imagine how angry i was when they stripped me down with no blankets a fan on full blast and wash down with cold water and ice. i have never been so pissed off with the nurses like i was that night and for the first time i started to swear and scream with no regards about the other patients trying to sleep. After all that, my temp was not getting any lower and i needed more iv access for antibiotics so the whole cannulation process began which again took a good 2 hours at least. They eventually got one in each foot but unfortunately both busted after a few hours and i was getting worst and i was very tachycardic my heart rate went up to 130bpm. My room was slowly filling up with nurses and doctors and then a consultant came down to try and put a central line in my neck but again that was not an easy job and it took her about an hour and a half. At this point i was exhausted and feeling so rough. They then made the decision to transfer me to Liver ITU as i had now developed sepsis but due to no beds i was transferred to the main transplant unit where i spent a few hours before being rushed to theatre to find that i had a duodenal ulcer/leak. After surgery i went to LITU where i got progressively worst and was put on TPN as i developed a fistula.

I didn't get any sleep last night because as i lay in bed i kept remembering that day and because i have been feeling very low recently I have been getting frequent panic attacks and they usually happen when i go to bed as I associate bed with all those days i spent lying in bed in hospital and being ill. I've had many bad days but that day in particular will go down as one of my top worst days of my life. Am hoping and praying i will never be in that situation again.